Sex With my Husband at the End of this Post

So, I got called a hypocrite the other day on G+ for talking about Canada’s withdrawal from Kyoto  (You can look it up here if you really want to.)  It wasn’t a huge deal, you get these trolls now and again, but it got me thinking.  Why do I put it out there?  Why do I open myself up to this crap?  It happens all the time on Facebook to my husband.  In person, too.  Talking to friends, family, well, heck they just don’t really want to hear it.  Global warming??  Peak Oil??  Food security??  “Hey, stop scaring people.”  So why the hell do we bother?  I’d probably be much happier keeping my head down and my mouth shut, come to think of it. 

I know!  It must be all the money those environmentalists pay me…..oh, wait.  That’s not it.  Hmm.  Must be the fabulous career opportunities in my community for a greenie…..uh, nope.  Let’s see.  Loads of respect and acclaim from my peers….<snort> yeah, right.  Being invited to all those parties.  Uh huh.  Sure.  Peace of mind??  HAHAHAHAHAHA . Nope.  As far as I can figure, I’ve got two reasons.

It’s a good excuse to have a drink in the evenings, after the kids are in bed and all the day’s work is done.  I can holler, “Hon, make me a little somethin’ somethin’ while I post this stuff about global warming, would ya?” and there’s just no problem with that.  Makes the words a bit more fluid, you know?  A little easier.  Lubes the brain gears a bit, drops the inhibitions so I say what I mean, not what you wanna hear.  Plus, the more pissed off I get, the more I wanna drink.  Pissed or pissed off, now there’s a good question… 

But still.  I guess I could post a bunch of Facebook happy crappy about kittens and rainbows, as Chris calls it, and get a bazillion likes, bam, right across the board and just leave it at that.  All inspirational and sickly sweet and smarmy stuff.  Get my load of saccharine for the night and tuck myself into bed, all tired from reading dopey sayings all night long.  You know, like this shit:

Say Nothing and Wish you Had  

It’s all over FB.  (Where do they find this crap?)  Take a good look, though.  It’s meant to talk about human relationships – to speak or not to speak, that is the question.  But it illustrates my point, and I chose it for exactly that reason.  I’ve gotta try to get to the rest of you.  ‘Cause if I don’t, nothing’s gonna change.  The science has been out there for thirty years or more, and nobody even knows it.  It gets covered up and confused and just really down and dirty.  And if we don’t do something soon, well, I’m gonna be wishing I’d said plenty more, and a lot frigging earlier, too.

I don’t want to wake up one morning and look out at my window at a yellow sky and a purple ocean at stunted dead trees with no leaves, gasping for breath and still feeling tired because there’s no more coffee since Brazil has turned into a flipping desert and Juan Valdez had to nosh on the fucking donkey since the cows all died from lack of feed.  Oh man, you think I’m exaggerating?  READ A BOOK OR TWO – check my list over at Barking Mad Farms.  Surf the web – there’s lots of links out there.  You’ve got the fucking tools right in front of you so USE THEM.  I don’t want to have to tell my son and daughter about how it used to be, how the trees used to have leaves and the birds used to come and sit in the feeder near our window while we had breakfast, and the garden used to grow tomatoes and the dogs used to play in that field over there.  I don’t wanna past tense everything that belongs in a child’s life like food and air and water.  If you read a couple books or articles, and you don’t think the facts fit what I’m saying, what you see happening around you every day, well, then, ignore me.  Don’t worry about it.  Just go back to sleep and hope that nothing really bad is going to happen despite the fact that there’s a lot of really educated people writing books and doing research and trying to fucking tell you that, “Hey guys, we’re seeing some problems coming up here and maybe we should think about doing something, soon, hey???  Hello?” 

Right.  Ahem.  (That’s a two drink post, so far.  I just waggled my cup at Chris, he’s gone to get another.)  Where was I?  Righto.  So, why do they (the activists), and I (another activist), even bother?  It must be the big bucks.  Hmm.  We talked about that already.  Let’s take a different tack.  Who’s telling you everything is okay?  The “news”?   Government?  Corporations?  Hmm.  Do I need to say more???  Okay, if you insist.  Pretend you’re an actor, auditioning for the part of “Hey, Everything’s Okay Out There”.  What’s the motivation?  Well, who owns the media?  I bet if you take even a token look, you will find that BIG CORPORATIONS own most television and newspaper media.  Government?  Again, take a look.  You will find that most candidates are funded by, are you starting to figure it out now too?  BIG CORPORATIONS.  And finally, we have – BIG CORPORATIONS.  Now, what do BIG CORPORATIONS want?  (Okay this is getting hard to type and Chris came back with my drink.  So I’m just gonna shorten it up with an acronym… hmm.  How about BS?  That’s way easier to type.  Okey doke.)  BS wants to make lots and lots of money.  What else?  I’m thinking….not coming up with anything else.  BS just wants to make lots and lots of money this year, and just wants to figure out how to make lots and lots of money next year, oh yeah, without paying any taxes or benefits to employees and stuff like that there.  Telling BS that they shouldn’t run the huge factory in China and make cheap cheap crap that breaks after six minutes does not go over well as it means BS might not make lots and lots of money next year.  Whew, I am typing much faster now that I am thinking about all the BS mindset.  Likewise, if you start to examine BS, you might start to smarten up and realize you don’t need that plastic Halloween pumpkin made in China and then you might not give them lots and lots of YOUR money anymore.  That would just suck for BS.

Now, compare the BS’ motivation to someone like, oh, let’s see, David Suzuki.  You think he makes big bucks telling you this crap?  There’s gotta be a lot of whack jobs screaming posts at him all the time.  Does he do it for the glory??  The women??  The cars??  COME ON.  He does it because he sees what’s going on.  He’s been in the “business” for forty years.  He just wants us to do something about it before it’s too late.  That’s my second reason, too.  I WANT YOU TO WAKE UP BEFORE YOU SMELL NO COFFEE.  Seriously.  I called this post “Sex with my Husband at the End of this Post” because I knew about two million people would read it then.  Remember Fluffy the Campfire Slayer up there?  Well, I’m going with SAYING SOMETHING.  I can always wish I hadn’t in the morning. 

Also because now I’ve had three drinks and I’m getting a little wobbly….  So there probably will be sex at the end of this post.  Maybe tomorrow I’ll post some pics.  :)

PS.  For you real perverts out there, if you read the post over again, you will find some lewd words in there.  *head* *come* *all night long* *bam* *lubes* *suck* *down and dirty*   Did I miss any?  <grin>  I’m so glad you read the post again. 

PPS.  Why aren’t you outraged?


  1. Laura Millar says:

    I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your blog. I started following when Chris ran for the Green party nomination, and this link was presented thru AHSA.

    I, too, am guilty of drinking and typing. Mayes, Kent, and Harper got a scathing email when it first leaked they were dropping Kyoto. I got a reply from Mayes, the usual talking points, but a reply none the less. I sent back, while tipping a couple, a quite dark reply about the futility of trying to restart growth via the tar sands and pipelines, when the IEA gives us five years before not just inconvenient, but game over climate change takes place.

    I sent graphs, links, and references. No reply to the second one. I was feeling a little fringe…. did I go to far?

    My friend told me today she read both letters, and was proud of me, and inspired. So I will type, and talk again. And if a couple drinks keep the words coming, so be it.

    So Samara and Chris, I don’t know you, but I am proud of you both. From someone at the beginning of understanding these issues and finding a way to deal, thank you. Your passion helps fuel me when I want to say “f**k it, why bother.” Keep going.

  2. Samara Sonmor says:

    Thanks Laura! We have those days all the time. Good for you, writing to our government “representatives”. I think they are playing games with our future. The only thing we can do is try to wake up enough of our friends, family, neighbours, communities and so on, to try to convince them to pay attention.

    I was truly outraged again today — a few weeks ago Colin Mayes sent us a “Holiday card”. At the time I was pissed at the use of taxpayer funds to mail Christmas cards to his constituents (what for?? Are they gonna _unelect_ him now? I wish.) Anyhow, today, in the mail, we receive….the exact same card. AGAIN. Exactly the SAME. AGAIN. Does he think I will have a happier holiday? Maybe he read my Google + post about Kyoto and deliberately sent me a duplicate just to make me mad???? AGAIN? I think I should call the RCMP and have him charged with harassment. He is pissing me off. Surely there’s a law??

    Hmm. I am not even drinking yet. Oopsy. We should BOTH drink and type, Laura! Maybe we can get a Conservative somewhere to pay attention. Okay, maybe a Liberal?? NDP? Somebody over the age of 25? I’ll settle for any of the above.

    THANKS for the encouragement. Back ATCHA!

    (PS I have two other “blogs” with not very many posts on them, Barking Mad Farms and Practically Sustainable. Both sites have a big list of good books to read, which I find helpful for understanding and dealing with some things, sometimes…..)

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